Author: Mosh
Fandom: Bleach
Title:
Waste of Time
Pairing:
Ulquiorra/Szayelaporro
Rating:
PG-13
Summary:
Ulquiorra finally gets out of Grimmjow's caja negation... to find things are quite different from how he left them.
Disclaimer:
These characters are property of Kubo Tite. No money being made, no copyright or trademark infringement intended.
A/N:
I always seem to get bunnied for crack fic when I'm driving home from work. No idea why. :D With thanks and love to Teka Lynn for checking this over for me! 2000 words.

Note: You may not archive, re-post, or alter any of my stories without my permission. Please contact me first. Thanks!



Time within a counter membrane seemed to move differently from the outside world, with no shadows creeping along the ground or up the side of Aizen-sama’s palace, nothing to use to differentiate between morning, afternoon, evening. There was no concept of movement, or sound, or change of atmosphere, other than that which the prisoner himself made.

Grimmjow’s Caja Negación had been swift; a dirty trick, entirely the sort of stunt he would pull, and grin like a maniac while pulling it. Ulquiorra knew he could break it down, eventually. It was just a matter of time.

Time that moved in undetermined chunks: first, the long moments of his own frustration at the lower-ranking arrancar. Then came the moments of anger at himself for ending up trapped in the first place. Then, using his intelligence to figure out the weakest point of the membrane, he could put the final chunk of time to use and start to destroy the obstacle, tearing it down bit by bit.

Once free, Ulquiorra rose to his feet. Dusting off sand and grit from his hakama and coat, he immediately realised something wasn’t quite right.

For one thing, nobody was around.

For another, Aizen-sama’s palace was no longer a magnificent white roll of roofs and spires and gaping black windows, but a large and jagged pile of rubble on the Hueco Mundo landscape.

Shit, thought Ulquiorra, which was rare for him because he normally detested vulgarities like the lower-classes used. But looking around, at the silent and desolate horizon, then the mass of grey destruction to his left, he felt it was a fitting synopses of the general atmosphere. Everything has gone to shit.

Traversing the sand dunes wasn’t a problem - he had travelled around Hueco Mundo many times on foot, while recruiting strong hollows for Aizen-sama, or when taking himself away from the inner sanctum to train in the open. But picking his way through the rubble proved more tricky. Many of the fallen beams and blocks of concrete were unsteady, haphazardly piled on top of each other, and more than once Ulquiorra had to use Sonido to avoid an avalanche of rock falling on top of him.

He carefully navigated his way around a couple of half-standing pillars, and along a line of stone he assumed to be a corridor, its flagstones still set in a checkerboard pattern from when it had originally been made.

Ulquiorra figured one of two things had happened during his absence. First, the fight had been moved to a different location, and since he had been stuck in that blue-haired imbecile’s Caja Negación nobody thought to tell him. As angry as that made him feel, Ulquiorra hoped that was the case, because otherwise it meant-

“It’s all over. This is the end.”

Turning quickly at the interruption, Ulquiorra caught sight of a shock of pink hair among the drab grey debris. Figuring there was no other choice, he edged closer, picking up more of the familiar, grating voice.

“I’m so bored. There’s nothing left to do. I’m so alone.”

“Szayelaporro,” Ulquiorra said, striding towards the other arrancar.

“What-?” Szayelaporro rose to his feet quickly, but the moment he spotted Ulquiorra he seemed to deflate again. He slowly lowered himself back onto the rock he’d been draped over. “Oh, it’s just you. Of all the people to survive this too, it had to be Ulquiorra.” He spoke to nothing in particular, staring off at yet more grey rubble as if Ulquiorra was made of even baser material and not worth his acknowledgement.

“Where is Aizen-sama?” Ulquiorra demanded, stopping before him. “What happened here?”

Szayelaporro looked vaguely uncomfortable.

“I’m asking you what happened,” Ulquiorra said dangerously.

Finally, Szayelaporro tilted his head a fraction, raising his bone-rimmed, pink eyes. He let out a sigh. “You’re still here? Then I suppose I’ll tell you.” He seemed to steel himself for the next bit. “Basically, we lost. Aizen-sama fled. Tosen also fled. Ichimaru said he’d love to stay and play for a little longer, but he had to go, too. Everyone else is probably dead - I haven’t seen the others.” He rested his chin in the palm of his hand and looked away.

Ulquiorra stared down at Szayelaporro’s pink hair for a long time, digesting the news. His worst nightmares had come true. “Lost…” he said quietly. “I see. And Aizen-sama is definitely gone - from Hueco Mundo?”

“I believe so.” Szayelaporro crossed one leg over the other and started jiggling his foot impatiently. “There’s nothing left now. I’m just so bored - I haven’t felt like this since my brother left for the human world and never came back. I hated him, but at least it was someone to taunt.”

Ulquiorra slipped his hands into his hakama pockets and kicked at a pebble on the ground. There were plenty of pebbles to choose from. “What about your minions - can’t you taunt them?”

“I've eaten them already,” Szayelaporro said dismally. “I should have kept one or two for a time like this, but I really didn’t think we’d… well.”

Ulquiorra couldn’t say anything to that. He didn’t think they’d lose, either. Damn that foolish Grimmjow. If it hadn’t been for him, Ulquiorra would have never been sealed away, and they would have probably won the war. With his strength and intelligence, they could have been reaping the benefits of their victory by now - Aizen-sama would be on his way to the throne, the king of Soul Society, and all the arrancar his heavily rewarded subjects.

“Ulquiorra,” said Szayelaporro, pulling Ulquiorra from his thoughts. “I know you never liked me-”

“Nobody liked you,” Ulquiorra pointed out. Feeling at odds with the universe in general, he turned and sat down on the other half of the rock Szayelaporro was occupying.

Szayelaporro paused and Ulquiorra could almost hear the grind of his teeth. “But it looks like you and I could be the only ones left here with any kind of power,” he finally finished.

“Indeed.”

“So, looking at it that way, we will have to fight.”

“That is our way,” Ulquiorra agreed, knitting his fingers together on his lap and staring down at the ground. The truth was, he wasn’t in the mood to duel right now. He’d just escaped a bitch of a Caja Negación set up by someone on his own squad who was weaker than him, only to find everything he had ever known and believed in crumbled to tiny bits and pieces. As much as he preferred the clean, sharp edges of Hueco Mundo to the sludgy weight of the human world, there was little left here to fight over.

“You could sound more enthusiastic about it.” Szayelaporro tilted his head, his shoulder brushing Ulquiorra’s a little.

Ulquiorra said nothing. It was stupid, he realised - he was sitting there debating the merits of fighting a lower-ranking arrancar over a scrap of sand and a load of debris he wouldn’t know the first thing to do with.

Szayelaporro let out a dramatic sounding sigh, sitting up a bit straighter and clapping his hands on his knees. “Then, if you won’t fight, what shall we do instead?”

“Who said I want to do anything?” What he really wanted to do was find Aizen-sama and offer his strength, for what it was worth. Surely there was some way, some genius plan - Aizen-sama was an incredible strategist; Ulquiorra refused to believe he had given up and run away.

“Well we can’t just sit here and do nothing. I’ve eaten all my friends, and you don’t have any anyway, so all we’ve got left is each other.” Szayelaporro twisted slightly on the rock so he was facing Ulquiorra more directly.

He was sitting very close now, in fact, and Ulquiorra dipped his eyebrows at him in warning. “I do not need friends. They’re just extra baggage.”

“I won’t be your friend, then,” said Szayelaporro, and with that he leaned in, his pink-lashed eyelids sliding shut. “Call it... an experiment.” The heat of his breath touched Ulquiorra’s mouth milliseconds before his lips did, and then it was just skin, all soft and a little moist, right there on Ulquiorra’s lips where extra skin should not be. Szayelaporro tilted his head, just a fraction, so their mouths aligned more comfortably, and it suddenly struck Ulquiorra what was happening: this was that inane human physical exercise called 'kissing', the one that humans put so much stock into and went to pieces over.

This was a first kiss.

His first kiss.

“Hmm,” he mused, trying it out. Szayelaporro opened his mouth a little and Ulquiorra wondered if that was a challenge of some kind. After all, he had made a noise, and Szayelaporro had seemed to react to it. He felt fingers against his chest, moving up to slide along his collar, then the skin of his neck above his jacket.

In response, Ulquiorra reached up and curved one hand around Szayelaporro’s throat, squeezing a little.

“Mmph.” But Szayelaporro didn’t pull back; he opened his mouth more and licked across Ulquiorra’s lower lip, then in a bit, grazing back and forth along the line of his teeth. It was all Ulquiorra could do not to bite down - although it would have been satisfying to hear Szayelaporro’s scream, he did not fancy a mouthful of blood. Instead, Ulquiorra used the next best countermove, and pushed back with his own tongue, licking it against Szayelaporro’s with force and purpose. I am stronger.

The next noise to issue from deep within the other arrancar’s throat was an octave higher than his speaking voice. It rose at the end to a needy-sounding whine, and at the same time Szayelaporro scooted closer on the rock, his legs awkwardly bumping against Ulquiorra’s.

Increasing his grip on the other’s neck, Ulquiorra felt the next moan clearly in the palm of his hand, vibrating lightly.

He wasn’t sure if that meant he was winning or not - from the way Szayelaporro thrummed against him and made small, desperate noises, he thought perhaps he was. He kissed harder, forcing his tongue further into Szayelaporro’s mouth and then pulling back, then pushing in again, a slow, demanding grind. The other arrancar clutched at Ulquiorra’s shoulders, his fingernails digging in through the fabric of Ulquiorra’s coat.

Finally, Szayelaporro pulled back, their mouths making a weird, wet sound as he drew away. “Gah! Oh…” He didn’t sound in pain or particularly defeated, but he was definitely having problems breathing and Ulquiorra detected a high level of tension surrounding him - it seemed to radiate off Szayelaporro’s body in heated, pulsing waves.

Ulquiorra took that as his victory, and decided he'd had enough. “I’m bored of this.” Rising to his feet, he figured they were getting nowhere with this pointless kissing. He could be doing more constructive things. As he looked down at the other arrancar, Szayelaporro squirmed on the boulder and covered his lap with his hands quickly. “I’m not going to be one of your experiments.”

As he turned to leave, he heard movement from behind him, like the shifting of fabric over stone. “Where are you going?” The tone was indignant.

Ulquiorra stopped and turned his head, looking at the form sitting behind him out of the corner of his eye. “To find Aizen-sama.” He let his mouth curl up at the corner. “There’s nothing of any worth left here. You can have it all.”

He did not wait around to witness the sulking, but he could hear Szayelaporro’s insults gradually fading behind him as he climbed out of the worst of the rubble. Reaching a high, flat rise of rock, he scanned the sparse horizon.

He would find Aizen-sama, and Tosen-san and Ichimaru-san, even if it meant going to the human world to search for them. Then they could begin to rebuild their magnificent army, along with any remaining survivors, and fulfil the original goal.

It took Ulquiorra a little longer to decide whether he would mention Szayelaporro to Aizen-sama or not.

~Fin~

 



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